No, not in the sense that I wish I could jump off stuff and look completely silly in my underwear and a "My Little Pony" sparkly t-shirt.
Just in the sense that I am carefree, without stress and worry.
I wish I remembered what that was like. I *think* I felt that way in Canada. Day 2. Still not completely overwhelmed with missing my kids. Still oblivious to the big, hairy, terrifyingly scary bear that would soon be gracing our presence. Still not sick of doing my potty business in the woods. I didn't have to worry about work. The kids were well taken care of. I could just read, rest, relax, enjoy the company of my best friend.
Ah, but back to reality.
Things are weird here at work. Weird meaning that people are dropping like flies and leaving the company. Maybe I don't deal well with change and this is making me uneasy.
The girls aren't really adjusting to their new room at Daycare very well. Today was actually the best day since the big switch. But they still get so upset when I leave. Clinging to me and screaming "MOMMY!" as I walk out of the room. It breaks my heart. And I feel like shit. I hate that they are upset. I know that within five minutes, they are fine and dandy. But I don't see that. I just seeing the sad faces, eyes welled up with tears, little pudgy arms reaching for me as I slip out the door.
:(
It will get better. IT WILL GET BETTER.
I can't wait until the end of October. I'm flying to Omaha to re-connect with some of my best friends in the whole world. I have a feeling I'm really not going to want to leave. Luckily my kids and husband are staying behind, which will...without a doubt...be reason enough to flee Omaha.
That's about all for today. I hereby promise, to my
Bef, that I will TRY and be better at updating if she TRIES to get me an updated picture.
xoxo.
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